I haven't flown since well before 9/11. What should I expect at the airport?

[Ken]

Traveling to Arizona for a week of research on Saturday. I've googled the TSA regulations and whatnot. Seems the big concern is what kind of fluids you're bringing on the plane. Am I correct that the limit concerns only carry-on luggage? I don't have travel-sized bottles for shampoo and whatnot and was just going to pack all my toiletries in my checked baggage...

It's a 7:30am flight so I intend to be barely conscious and more cattle than human so attitude during security checks won't be an issue...but are there any things I need to watch out for? I fly so sporadically that I've not kept up with the new regulations.

[Jonny R]

Wear a leopard-skin print g-string in case you're strip searched. Better to be safe than sorry.

[GuitarStv]

Make sure you complete the following checklist before packing your carry-on luggage:
- Bowie Knife
- Rope
- Shotgun shells
- Gel of some type. Hair gel, Toothpaste, Shampoo . . . as long as it's in a big bottle.
- Several Hot Dogs wired to an Alarm Clock
- Copy of the Koran
- Newspaper cutouts in any language other than English

Also, don't shave for several weeks before boarding, and wear dark sunglasses inside the terminal.

Since they always seem to hassle the people who look the least likely to bomb planes, my theory is that they must be letting all the obvious ones get through to save more time to harass the average person.

[JumpMarine]

Not much of a change really, a bit slower going through the security check.

[tone4days]

leave plenty of time to deal with crowds at security

no pocketknife, etc ... (i lost my leatherman micro this way)

liquids in checked luggage is fine

if you can, wear shoes that slip off and back on easily - you'll have to take them off and get them Xrayed

if you are taking a laptop, it will have to come out of the carrying bag ... easiest to turn all your cellphones, b'berry's, etc off to go thru security too

good luck
t4d

[JOLLY]

leave plenty of time to deal with crowds at security

most definitely!!

[Ken]

Wear a leopard-skin print g-string in case you're strip searched. Better to be safe than sorry.

Make sure you complete the following checklist before packing your carry-on luggage:
- Bowie Knife
- Rope
- Shotgun shells
- Gel of some type. Hair gel, Toothpaste, Shampoo . . . as long as it's in a big bottle.
- Several Hot Dogs wired to an Alarm Clock
- Copy of the Koran
- Newspaper cutouts in any language other than English

Also, don't shave for several weeks before boarding, and wear dark sunglasses inside the terminal.

Since they always seem to hassle the people who look the least likely to bomb planes, my theory is that they must be letting all the obvious ones get through to save more time to harass the average person.

Okay, to be fair, I chuckled.



Thanks, Bill.

[Pierre]

I fly a lot (at least 6 times per year, last year was about 10 or so) and I noticed no changes WHATSOEVER.
But again in Europe we were always aware of the risks and so our controls were already in place.

[rivera213]

Enemas without lube are now mandatory.

Just warning ya.

[Jonny R]

Okay, to be fair, I chuckled.



Thanks, Bill.

Oh c'mon...you're not seriously telling me you don't own a leopard skin g-string?






Oh...am I the only one here...?

[Bludave]

I was just out in Vegas. What I have learned to do is carry NO carry on luggage. I usually can pack everything I need in one bag that I check. Problem solved. The security (or the illusion of) is ridiculously slow and there is really no reason for it. Making everyone remove shoes is just a joke. With the technology we have today and the volume of people that go through a typical American airport, we should be able to move people through the security area better than we do

[garublador]

I avoid bringing a carry-on with me as well. I might have my iPod and a book, but that's normally about it. I find it's easier than dealing with what I can and can't carry on. Just give yourself an hour and a half to two hours before your flight is scheduled to take off and you shouldn't have any problems.

[ginormous]

Make sure you complete the following checklist before packing your carry-on luggage:
- Bowie Knife
- Rope
- Shotgun shells
- Gel of some type. Hair gel, Toothpaste, Shampoo . . . as long as it's in a big bottle.
- Several Hot Dogs wired to an Alarm Clock
- Copy of the Koran
- Newspaper cutouts in any language other than English

Also, don't shave for several weeks before boarding, and wear dark sunglasses inside the terminal.

Since they always seem to hassle the people who look the least likely to bomb planes, my theory is that they must be letting all the obvious ones get through to save more time to harass the average person.

Don't forget your pound of bacon.

[The Golden Boy]

What should I expect at the airport?

A silly dog and pony show that's supposed to instill confidence that the TSA and "Homeland Security" is protecting you from the nebulous "terrorists."

I'm glad they're around so I can fly now. I didn't fly during the 80s because I was paralyzed with fear of the "communists" that lurked around every corner.

[Jonny R]

What are you like with tasers?

[DLT]

Wear a leopard-skin print g-string in case you're strip searched. Better to be safe than sorry.

[brit84]

I didn't fly during the 80s because I was paralyzed with fear of the "communists" that lurked around every corner.

im going to get you........

[brit84]

Make sure you complete the following checklist before packing your carry-on luggage:
- Bowie Knife
- Rope
- Shotgun shells
- Gel of some type. Hair gel, Toothpaste, Shampoo . . . as long as it's in a big bottle.
- Several Hot Dogs wired to an Alarm Clock
- Copy of the Koran
- Newspaper cutouts in any language other than English

Also, don't shave for several weeks before boarding, and wear dark sunglasses inside the terminal.

Since they always seem to hassle the people who look the least likely to bomb planes, my theory is that they must be letting all the obvious ones get through to save more time to harass the average person.

you forgot a conspicuous form of hat, and either a one piece cotton robe OR a white buisness suit. make sure not to pack anything that would make it seem like your comming back form where youre going, and only order a one way ticket

[Markk]

Make sure you complete the following checklist before packing your carry-on luggage:
- Bowie Knife
- Rope
- Shotgun shells
- Gel of some type. Hair gel, Toothpaste, Shampoo . . . as long as it's in a big bottle.
- Several Hot Dogs wired to an Alarm Clock
- Copy of the Koran
- Newspaper cutouts in any language other than English

Also, don't shave for several weeks before boarding, and wear dark sunglasses inside the terminal.

Since they always seem to hassle the people who look the least likely to bomb planes, my theory is that they must be letting all the obvious ones get through to save more time to harass the average person.

Oh please, spice it up a little. Where's the golf clubs and crossbow?

(someone had to have one day tried to bring in his crossbow because it seems to be on the warnings at certain airports)