so... I'm a homewrecker!

[stratobastard]

.

Matt, I really thought you were more intelligent than that, I guess not. Crusty's post didn't agree or disagree with anyone. And you really have me mistaken for someone else if you think I'm that in need of support & validation.

[crusty philtrum]

.

Matt, I really thought you were more intelligent than that, I guess not. Crusty's post didn't agree or disagree with anyone. And you really have me mistaken for someone else if you think I'm that in need of support & validation.

Thanks for that, i was just trying to figure out how to quote his post so that i could say exactly what you just said on my behalf .... I was neither endorsing nor condemning your position, simply accepting the state of play as you have presented it to us.

[ericmeyer4]

[80's_Metal]

[Hellion]

Strat, I hope it works for you. I've been in similar situations in the past (on all sides of the "love triangle"), and while they've never worked out in my favor, they certainly can and do. Give her time and space and see what happens.

[ratherdashing]

I know crusty wasn't supporting you, but the fact is that there are also many other really intelligent guys in this thread advising you based upon life experience and sound reasoning. You seem to have written those off and instead praised the views of a guy who didn't criticise you... That does look like you have blinkers on and are just looking for validation, you can see that right?

Yeah, it's pretty clear this thread has one of two purposes:

1. "I just did something really questionable, but I want to feel good about it, so I'm seeking validation on the forum."

2. "I just did something really questionable, and I get my kicks by stirring up controversy, so I'm gonna post it on the forum and get my back up if anyone questions me."

[GuitarGuy503]

How bout the Jesse James and Kat Von D? Jesse James cheated on Sandra Bullock with another girl(s) which resulted in divorce with them. Then eventually he was on again off again with Kat Von D who now claims he cheated on her with 19 different girls (surprise surprise...lol). Having said that, some people never change. When someone has betrayed trust once there is good reason to have doubt in them in the future. Regardless, that your friends marriage was over a long time ago, as said, it doesn't change the fact that she is still married and is bailing from her marriage to be with you. Hopefully, things will workout the way you expect but there are definately things to be concerned about as history does tend to repeat itself. As said, who's to say that this girl wouldn't leave you for someone else if she became unhappy in a relationship or marriage with you? As said, watch yourself.....

[Wonker]

Wait till she does it to you

[Diego]

This is the kind of thing I'd keep for myself real quiet y'know?

[JOLLY]

I wonder how many other guys she was with before Strato while she was still married.

[Varg]

I wonder how many other guys she was with before Strato while she was still married.

I dont get this kinda post. Why is it so hard to believe she was with her husband, unhappily, but faithfully, for years, before finding this guy?
Why is it assumed anyone, of either sex, who eventually cheats on their partner - no matter how crap their relationship - must be a whore?
You guys are incredibly childish. It seems to be "Jesus says its bad so BURN motherf**ker!" or "she did it with you, she will do it again cos shes a SLAG!"

[ImmortalSix]

Yeah, it's pretty clear this thread has one of two purposes:

1. "I just did something really questionable, but I want to feel good about it, so I'm seeking validation on the forum."

2. "I just did something really questionable, and I get my kicks by stirring up controversy, so I'm gonna post it on the forum and get my back up if anyone questions me."

I dont get why people post stuff like this on here

Sure you do.

[Varg]

Do you ever post a full sentence, or is it always three syllables, or a smiley or a picture lifted from the net you reply with?
You DO know how to write a full sentence, yes?
I assume you just feel the need to have a high post count as many people on forums like this do.

Go you!

[ratherdashing]

I dont get this kinda post. Why is it so hard to believe she was with her husband, unhappily, but faithfully, for years, before finding this guy?
Why is it assumed anyone, of either sex, who eventually cheats on their partner - no matter how crap their relationship - must be a whore?
You guys are incredibly childish. It seems to be "Jesus says its bad so BURN motherf**ker!" or "she did it with you, she will do it again cos shes a SLAG!"

There are always exceptions, but generally the best way to predict someone's future behaviour is to examine their past behaviour.

[JOLLY]

I dont get this kinda post. Why is it so hard to believe she was with her husband, unhappily, but faithfully, for years, before finding this guy?
Why is it assumed anyone, of either sex, who eventually cheats on their partner - no matter how crap their relationship - must be a whore?
You guys are incredibly childish. It seems to be "Jesus says its bad so BURN motherf**ker!" or "she did it with you, she will do it again cos shes a SLAG!"

I apologize, I didn't know wasn't allowed to wonder such things. I'm sorry, I'll follow your rules for how my mind should work and how I should be posting from now on, NOOB!!

[Kam]

I dont get this kinda post. Why is it so hard to believe she was with her husband, unhappily, but faithfully, for years, before finding this guy?
Why is it assumed anyone, of either sex, who eventually cheats on their partner - no matter how crap their relationship - must be a whore?
You guys are incredibly childish. It seems to be "Jesus says its bad so BURN motherf**ker!" or "she did it with you, she will do it again cos shes a SLAG!"

He didn't really insinuate that she'd slept with any other guys. The answer could very easily be none. It's still a legitimate question to ponder.

Do you ever post a full sentence, or is it always three syllables, or a smiley or a picture lifted from the net you reply with?
You DO know how to write a full sentence, yes?
I assume you just feel the need to have a high post count as many people on forums like this do.

Go you!

You've obviously never asked him about John Mayer.

[ImmortalSix]

I6 IN DA HAO-USSSSSE

[Hellion]

C'mon, guys, cut them both some slack. You're not in their position, and Heaven forbid that you were (been there myself), I've no doubt you'd have the same sentiments as Strat and the lady in question. Why can't you just wish them good luck?

[LesStrat]

Projection

[TattooedCarrot]

What I find funny, is that Strato and a few others in response seem to think this behavior is acceptable simply because she was unhappy in her marriage and that the husband didn't care. Maybe so, but they should have addressed that and moved on. The fact is they remained married and that no matter how you try to spin it, it was an affair, and IMO was immoral. But again, that's IMO. I'm sure the fact I've been married for 24 years contributes to my opinion.

I have a cousin who was in a similar situation. He was cheating with a (unhappily) married woman. In his mind, he was rescuing her. The marriage ended upon discovery of the affair and she, and her 2 kids, moved in with my cousin. They got married as soon as her divorce was final. Fast-forward 9 years and another kid and they just separated pending divorce because she was cheating on him and he was obsessed with trying to catch her in it. Add the drinking and fighting and it was a horrible situation for both of them, and most of all the kids who were the real victims of the debauchery.

Good luck with your situation, you're going to need it. Castles made of sand............